It's weird. can't believe i've been in the hospital for 7 months. It seems so long but short at the same time. Everyday is starting to feel like groundhog day - sometimes I feel like I'd do anything to make the day go a different way, to get off this track I'm on.

I did play Mancala today. That was a change, I haven't played a game in a long time. Of course I won more times than not, haha. :) I just HAD to add that little tid bit!

I have been such a news-junkie since the 2000 election debacle.. but now, the more I see the more worried I get. I mean - our leaders INCLUDING the White House isn't even bothering to follow the rule of law and 230 year old precedents anymore! They are closing businesses that are profitable and telling preferred stockholders that they come second in line to the Unions. Sometimes I just think America has gone insane. I'm more than worried.. I am scared. Where are we going? No one in "charge" seems to know or care - as long as their gov't charge cards don't get cut up. Another thing.. the President freely admits we're "out of money" and yet he is just going full steam ahead - on the Express Train w/ no brake - with his healthcare plan. I'm no genius but uhm.. where's that money coming from?

I have to seriously get off that subject, just like I have to turn the channel - right before I blow a critical blood vessel. At least I'm in a hospital though, I figure I'm a little safer than the general public who would have to wait for an ambulance or drive themselves.

Alright, another subject coming right up.

Somehow I ended up with tendonitis in my left elbow/wrist. No one can figure out how I seemed to get it since it's usually caused by repetitive motion (a common term for it is "tennis elbow" because of the constant motion of the elbow and wrist when playing). I don't do any serious repetitive motion and I'm in bed a lot of the time.. so.. hmm.. that's a mystery. All I know is I am happy to say it's starting to go away. I was getting serious sick of wearing a brace on my arm AND wrist. The wrist brace isn't so bad, you can work with with and still use your fingers (I'm even wearing it right now) - the elbow brace is a real drag. It's basically the full length of the arm and it holds your elbow in a 90 degree angle. I did take it off 2-3 times a day to do some VERY painful exercises, so that wasn't much of a nice break. Thankfully, the pain has pretty much disapated and now it just feels like I haven't stretched my arm out in a long time.

I am really starting to miss going to school and doing school work. I'm considering taking one online course, I know I could not handle 2 or more at a time. Just because I never know when things are going to happen around here and I don't have a lot of control of when they do happen, so I wouldn't be reliable enough of a student - and no more staying up all night to do homework since it's lights out at midnight - which still seems juvenile, but I can finally understand it - it takes a toll being woken up so much, so the earlier beddy-bie comes, the more sleep you get. Before I got sick going to bed at 12 would've seemed laughable, but now, man I am ready to go even earlier and find myself falling asleep all the time.

I can't believe it's summer already. This is the first year I've missed going to Festival - for those of you who don't know what it is it's the biggest festival focused on art and music in the country (from what I've heard). I miss the walking taco stand that I always crunch Frito chips at for my church.

I haven't lost hope.. there is still a fire burning in there that things are going to get better. I'm not giving up. I'm NEVER giving up. Life is not always happy, it's not supposed to be, it's meant to be filled with challenges and battles to fight and things to build our confidence and our faith in ourselves and God. This has been and continues to be a long journey I am on.. it's been quite an adventure so far! I know there are more ups and downs coming and the roller coaster ride isn't over. This is my life though and I have DECIDED that I am going to be as content and positive as I can be wherever I am, whatever my circumstances. Attitude is everything and even though I may have a bad attitude about some things, it's not going to last for long or rule my world.

Good wishes to everyone!